Lessons learning: Perfectionism

I call this.... lessons learned.... and lessons still being learned.

Perfectionism.

First off, for those who know me, you know that I'm not speaking on this from the outside looking in.... I struggle with this, but I want to share what I am learning about it.

In LDS culture we feel a need to be perfect.  We need to be skinny, strong, beautiful, a good baker, pinteresty (it's a thing), crafty, involved, musical, successful, the list goes on and on....

 In the Gospel of Jesus Christ we know that we are to "be ye therefore perfect, even as my Father in Heaven is perfect".... there we have it.. Be perfect.

 But whose definition of perfect are we living by? God's?  or the world's?  And to top it off, the footnote for the word perfect in Matt 5:48  is "complete, finished, fully developed.".... beautiful.

The whole test of this life is choice.  What are we choosing?  Are we choosing to strive and struggle and make mistakes and use the Atonement and honestly do all we can to be more like Christ? Then our Heavenly Father is so pleased, regardless of the time table.

There was a talk in the ensign that really changed my life. Become Perfect in Christ  It says that sometimes we equate being perfect with never making a mistake... (umm.... guilty as charged....) But I now realize if I never made a mistake I would never need to change... I would never need to rely on Chirst. And then I would have no real deep and lasting relationship with Him.  It says in the talk "we can gratefully accept, as God's sons and daughters, that we are His greatest handiwork even though we are still a work in progress."  Perfection will never be reached until we are resurrected... we literally will never be fully perfect in this life.  But we can just add more light and goodness and compassion as we go.

I need to let go. Let go of holding myself to unreal expectations.... Frustration comes from unmet expectations.  I want to shoot high and strive for the best obviously, but just embrace my flaws with gratitude that I'm alive.  What makes me imperfect makes me beautiful.  Let go of not fully living and loving for fear of making a mistake. Let go and let God. When I do that I will (in time... a long time...) become perfect.

From me to you, Kinzie Lou

This is the testimony that is in me.

Hello Everyone!

Greetings from it-started-snowing-and-wouldn't-stop-snowing-glitter-snow-all-weekend-it-was-celebrating-my-departure-Colorado!

I can't believe it.  My last week as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints... until I put in my papers again. haha... I'm not sure mama Sheri would stand for that.  I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY! I feel like Alma... wishing I could be an angel spreading the gospel forever...

The work is going great, and I'm a happy camper. I feel just happy knowing I tried my best and I've finally realized that our best does not equal perfect. Sometimes I think it has to for me... but I'm repenting of that.

I am so grateful for the chance I've had to serve the Lord and come to know Him in a very real way.  Here are some wonderful things that I learned for myself on my mission.

*it's not all about me.

*The Savior lives and is still playing an active role in my life.

*God loves me and is perfectly patient.. even with my impatience. Amazing.

*Repentance is simply letting go anything that separates us from God, and replacing it with good.

*Jesus Christ is the perfect gentleman and will never steal our sins or trials or pains from us, He will only take them if we give them to Him. So do it!

*The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is God's organization that offers us Christ's full Gospel and Atonement because of the Priesthood.

*The Priesthood is REAL.

*The Holy Ghost speaks to us in our own language if we will just ask, and listen.

*We can ALWAYS change. It is the purpose of the Gospel.

*Sharing the Gospel brings the utmost joy.

*Open communication solves every problem in relationships. that and the Atonement.

*Thomas S. Monsen is in fact a living prophet of God.

*Joseph Smith was not only a good and honorable man, who was human and made small mistakes in his life, but he was the humble servant chosen by God to restore the Gospel to this earth. He did in fact see God and he did in fact give us access to Christ's saving ordinances again in these days.

*It is happier to choose to be happy than unhappy.

*Jesus Christ will walk with us, hand in hand if we let Him.

*Angels are very real and are all around us.

*Repentance is the key to happiness

*there is no growth in the comfort zone and it's not comfortable in the growth zone

*The Book of Mormon is still my favorite book, and is unquestionably straight from God. There is no other option.

*I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY!

I love you all. Thank you for your love and support and letters and emails and prayers... and wow that was the worst grammatically written sentence ever! Thank you for reading and putting up with my ranting. 

I love you, and I love my Savior with my whole soul. I'm going to continue living for Him and His work, just in a different way. We all can. I invite you to think about all of the things that you are grateful for, and promise God one thing you are going to strive to do til the end of the year to be more consecrated to Him.  He will help you and bless you.

Onward and Onward and Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

pics

some of my best friends on the mish at my final zone conference

me and our investigator Makenna. love her!

Reverently and Meekly Now

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from out-of-nowhere-an-arctic-wind-straight-from-Canada-arrived-to-usher-in-winter-Colorado! 

Our warm and sunny parade just got rained on... sadly.  But I can't complain, I've been so spoiled! 

It has been a great week! I can't believe how fast it has been going!!!   Next week will be my last email home.... hmmm I had better think of something profound to say...

This week I've been able to have great conversations with people and we've been able to clear up A LOT of misconceptions... and just bear testimony of the Book of Mormon. I'm trying really hard to make that my legacy that I leave. I want everyone in Parker that I talk to know that I love the Book of Mormon and know that it is from God.  My testimony of it is etched into my soul.... when everything gets hard I will always refer back to that testimony. I'm grateful for that gift God has given me... I realize that a testimony is a gift from God.  We have to work for it... study, pray, apply, live, experiment, talk about it, and pray some more.... but that is a gift that God is very eager to give us. He just wants to make sure we truly desire it because He won't give us something we aren't ready for that we are then held accountable. He is very merciful that way... but when we show real intent then He is ready to give. 

I'm so grateful for reasonable people in my life.  My companion has been so great at helping me see the good and positive and to not listen to the voices of doubt and worry and regret that Satan is trying to plant in my head to make me sad.  I know that I'm not perfect. I have a pretty perfect knowledge of that fact.  But I'm so grateful that because of Christ's love, I can change. 

I've been studying about meekness as of late.  Jesus Christ is the epitome of meekness... as with every other good attribute.  In Moroni 7 it teaches us that faith and hope and charity come from having a meek and lowly heart.  Well what is meekness? I often just interchanged it with humility, but that's not entirely accurate.  Meekness is being teachable, patient in suffering, good, kind, submissive, and humble.  More important question is HOW do we become meek?  Many of you would probably agree that submissive is NOT one of the words that would be in my dictionary entry.  In Ulysses S. Soares talk "Meek and Lowly of Heart" he teaches us how. 

1st) pray for the gift of meekness. 

2nd) control our temper.... how do we react when we don't get our way? 

3rd) take it one day at a time... it is a process. Be a little better each day

4th) be humble... seek God's will and recognize His hand.. trust Him

5th) always look to the example of the Savior.  How could he possibly forgive and treat with kindness those who scourged Him and crucified Him? He was Meekness personified... Pure love. 

Why is meekness so important?  Because after the Savior's Atonement fulfilled the law of sacrifice (yes folks, we don't sacrifice lambs anymore... thankfully) Christ taught us that now what we are to sacrifice is a broken heart and a contrite spirit.... that is synonymous for being meek and lowly of heart.  Be kind. Be good. Trust God. Be patient. Love others. That is what I will be striving to do a better job at. 

I invite you all to reflect and think about the state of your heart. Are you meek? Are you full of love? Are you quick to anger? Are you quick to be proud and defensive?  We can all change.. together. 

I love my Savior.  He is so patient with us. He helps us become more like Him. If we didn't help us with His grace, there would be NO way we could do it.  He is pulling with us. 

I love you all!!! Thank you for all your love and support. You are the best. 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

ridiculous picture:

they made me sit in a chair, and they pretended to "kill" me.... oh the weirdness of missionaries. 

It is well with my soul -

Hello Everyone! 
Greetings from it-was-the-first-snow-of-the-winter-and-it-already-melted-away-oh-how-I-love-it-Colorado!   I've been so blessed to have had such a warm fall... I've only worn boots 3 times this fall season. awesome. 

We had a fun Halloween party on Saturday... a Soup and Spook. I got to be a judge of the chili and soup cookoff... tough job, let me tell ya.  haha. it was fun! 

On Halloween day, for some strange reason all of the crows in the Denver metro area wanted to be where I was. 1) i don't like birds in general 2) crows are my LEAST favorite of the species 3) HOW DID THEY KNOW IT WAS HALLOWEEN? #socreepy  It was slightly terrifying. 

The lessons with the Foreign exchange students are going well! I love them all so much!!!!  the 3 girls love us...It's so neat to be a part of their lives in a small way.

I love the investigators we teach. Robert and Diana are AMAZING! They are close friends with a member family (which is how we started teaching them) but they are just getting closer to baptism every lesson. I love them!  

You all know that I've been an open book in my emails, and I don't try to cover up if I've had a hard week... Missions are hard.  We feel a small part of the rejection and heart ache prophets, and even the Savior felt during His mission (a very small part thankfully)... but I'm so grateful for my companion talking sense into me. I was just wanting the last transfer to be the best... miraculous... accomplishing all that God wanted me to accomplish (or what I thought He wanted me to do) 
She lovingly called me to repentance and just told me to let it go. So I did. I let go of my righteous desires and my bad desires too. I gave them all to the Savior and told the Lord that it's His mission and not mine. This is His work and not mine. I would love to see conversion, but maybe He is wanting to see refinement in His daughter. I was wanting to be a difference maker, but maybe God wanted me to be here so a difference could be made in me. I know that I'm learning so much about how to be an effective member missionary so that I will be able to CONTINUE sharing the Gospel in the Lord's way all my life. When I had a change of perspective, and when I repented and really said "Thy will be done... and I'm ok that I don't understand thy will all of the time" I literally felt the burden lifted from my shoulders. Christ was just waiting for me to give it to Him so He could take it while respecting my agency.... It was an amazing experience. 

I love my Savior so much.  He is the best of all best friends we could have.  In the Hymn book if often uses the word friend, but is sure to capitalize it.  He is my kind wise Heavenly Friend... so true. 

Sometimes God lets us struggle and face opposition even when what we want is a RIGHTEOUS DESIRE! He is the perfect investor, because He has perfect patience. Sometimes He is able to hold off in blessing us with what we WANT and what will make us immediately HAPPY for giving us what is BEST for our GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT AND lasting JOY. I'm glad He is smarter than me, even though I like getting my way too often.  

My invitation to you this week is to have a conversation with the Lord.  He knows what you want, but I invite you to offer up all the desires of your heart and then hand it over. Trust Him. Do the best you can and have faith that He is the High Priest of Good things to Come.  

I love you all. I miss you! I can't believe that in 3 weeks I'll be home... In the meantime I'll cherish every day here in Denver. 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou  

pics... happy halloween!

He Lives to Wipe Away My Tears

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from I'm-so-happy-that-the-weather-has-stayed-this-lovely-and-there-hasn't-been-a-single-sign-of-snow-Colorado!! 

Yep... I'm spoiled... I'm so grateful. 

This week has been an interesting week to say the least, but I always come back to my mission motto "There's no growth in the comfort zone, and it's not comfortable in the growth zone".... why am I so right?  ha ha.  I'm very grateful that God loves me enough to give me one more growth zone before I get sent back to all of you.  I want His image to be in my countenance, and I know that that process sometimes has to be painful.... I don't want to kick against the pricks anymore, but to willingly let the Savior change me. With whatever process He chooses to use.. 

Wow... I was going to give a completely different spiritual thought but then I read Sister Brown's weekly email in which she completely answered my prayers.  As I come to the close of my mission, with the knowledge and understanding that I have now, I sometimes wish I could go back and redo, or I worry if I haven't accomplished the miracles God wanted me to accomplish... I hear stories from other missionaries and they seem to end in "and 2 weeks later they were baptized"... and then I wonder if I haven't done what I should have done.... but I realize that God didn't send me here to serve a perfect mission. He sent me here to learn and grow. He sent me here to work miracles, yes, but those miracles come in many different shapes and sizes. For some missionaries, those are hosts of people dressed in which entering a baptismal font (and I have been very blessed to witness a few myself) but maybe a miracle is answering the prayer of a member and letting them know God was thinking about them, maybe it was coming to serve someone who was at the end of the rope and exhausted.... God has many ways that He shows His love, and His tender mercies are real. I am a witness of that. I'm grateful that He has allowed me to be a means of someone receiving a tender mercy, and I'm also very thankful that He has sent many my way too.  My invitation to you this week is to pray to be an answer to someone's prayer every day this week... follow through with the promptings you get, especially if they don't make sense. The Spirit rarely prompts us to do something convenient or in our comfort zone... or else we would already be doing it, right?  So let's all be the means of a tender mercy this week!

I love you all so much. I am so grateful for my mission. I'm so grateful for my Savior. I know that He lives, and that He loves me and perfectly understands me.  I know that He wipes away my tears... even if they are silly irrational tears. He cares so much about us. 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

STAND IN THE GAP!

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from i'm-continually-amazed-at-how-much-people-like-to-decorate-for-Halloween-here-it-is-borderline-terrifying-Colorado! 

These Coloradans are hilarious.... 

What a week.... Sister B and I are adjusting to being companions, but all is well. I'm so grateful for all of the different companions I was able to have on my mission. I learned something new from every single one.... God is soo in charge of this work and just shapes us and molds us if we let him!  It's wonderful.

We have been led to AMAZING people.  We went to an address on the ward directory, but the family had moved. Who lived there now?? A woman who was watching BYU tv at that very moment, who had so many Mormon friends growing up.  She let us in for a drink of water and after talking with her for a good 15 minutes, she wants to meet with us. AMAZING!!!!!  Heavenly Father has been so good to me... sometimes I can't even express how happy and grateful I am. 

The next member finding principle I want to share with you is about the need to stand in the gap. 

Matthew 22:37-40 teaches us that the first commandment is to love God, and the second is to love our neighbor. God loves His children perfectly.  Just like a parent sending a kid to college or even on a mission, that parent prays that someone will be there to watch out for their child and love them while they can't.  It is the same with us. God wants us to reach out and love and support and help our brothers and sisters because that is a means of Him answering prayers said and unsaid.  There is such a need to reach out and stand in the gap for people... a gap is something that separates. Maybe a gap is sadness, loss of job, loss of loved one, misunderstanding, confusion, worry, questions.... we who have the gospel can love our friends and stand in the gap for them and help them when they need it most. We should seek to have friends of all faiths, not as a means to an end, but as an end in itself. We can be so enriched by gaining more understanding of others' beliefs, and then if they ever have a gap, we can stand in and be a good friend who helps them as they are away from home.

My invitation to you all is to seek one way to expand your circle of friends this week.  Be a little more friendly, invite an acquaintance to something in which you can become a friend.  As we love our neighbors, and love God, and love the Gospel the light we have will be a blessing to everyone around us.

I know that God does know every single one of His children, and He loves them. Even those that don't love Him back.  He is ever ready to show us that love if we'll just turn to Him. 

I love you all.... I can't believe that in 5 weeks time I'll be back... bugging ya... not from a distance. haha. I'm still praying for you!  

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

The First of the Last!

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from as-soon-as-the-trees-are-beautiful-they-start-to-die-Colorado! I think it is so fitting that I'm finishing up my mission in the fall.... everything is so beautiful, and then it moves on to it's winter preparation, and just goes to the next season. Fall is my favorite transition season.  I'm going through a transition season too... I love my mission sooo much! I'm so happy that I have 6 more weeks to do everything I can to fully serve the Lord, and give Him my all. I just want to sprint to the finish line. 

My dear friend Chelsey asked what my biggest fears and excitements are as I approach the end of my mission, and after writing everything I'm excited for in the rest of my life, it hugely outweighed the fears. Life is good, and there is a time and place for everything.  We always can look forward with excitement and hope, and still cherish the sun that is shining on this very day. 

So I'll be finishing my mission here in Parker, and I'm soo happy about it! I love this area. I love this ward. My new companion is Sister Bertagnole (silent G... it's Italian.) who I served around 6 weeks ago in Brighton.  She is the sweetest sister EVER.  I'm excited to learn from her.   From now on to help save me 5 seconds every time I refer to her, I'll just call her sister B.... 

We found a new investigator last week named Donna. She is awesome.  She has had a rough last few years and is on the verge of abandoning her belief in God.  She doesn't know how she can suffer if there is a God who supposedly loves her.  It is true, that we experience very hard things in this life.  Things that are not fair, at all.... but are just a part of the world we volunteered to come to.  God doesn't abandon us in those trials, but is unmoving.... the thing that changes is us.  We sometimes choose to turn away.... but even if we do that God loves us. It never changes.  And He will be in the exact same place He was before we left.... to find Him again we simply start with "Dear Heavenly Father..."  It can be that simple.  

I know that God lives.  I know that He loves us.  I know that because He loves us He sent Jesus Christ here to pay the debt to justice.  For us, and also paying the debt that justice owes us when unfair things happen. He can offer us healing, solace, and understanding instead.  I want you all to think about how you came to know that God is real.  How can you feel that again?  If there are any of you that aren't quite sure, I invite you to try. Ask Him if He is there. He will let you know.  You all have to watch the video "Hope of God's light". Click there on search on LDS.org.... Sooo goood!!!!! 

I love you all and I know that God loves you even more. 

I miss you and I'll do everything I can the next six weeks to make that moment when I conclude be sweet, not bittersweet.  

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

pics... tree to illustrate fall. #hippie #treehuggerofthefamily

I had dinner with ALISON!!!! I've been waiting my whole mission to serve in Parker, and it finally happened!!!!!! amazing! 

OPEN OUR MOUTHS

Hello Everyone!

Greetings from I-got-my-first-hot-coco-of-the-season-mmm-sea-salt-caramel-Colorado! 

I just love this time of year. It makes me so happy. And sometimes on Friday nights as we are out finding we hear the drumline and band from the nearby high school football game. Those simple pleasures of life always make me smile..love em.

General Conference! WOW! It was soo great.  First off, I love our Prophet. I love Him. After all the talks about sustaining the prophet, and blessings that come from that I was ready for whatever he had to say! But what did he say?  Walk as Jesus walked. Be like the Savior.  beautiful. He truly is such a Christ-like leader.

Can we just talk about how amazing Elder Bednar's talk was... and the joke he cracked? That is missionary humor to the T... the only things we remember to quote these days are the scriptures. hilarious. I just love how he spelled out that we share the Gospel because we love it, and we love the Lord. Amen.

Today I want to talk about Opening our Mouths as we share the gospel.  

D&C 33:8-10 they all start with Open your mouth. It says we will be like Nephi of old. why choose nephi for the reference?  because nephi went to get the plates "not knowing beforehand what I was to do".... sometimes as we talk with our friends we are afraid of not knowing what to say or not wanting to be awkward, but if we just are kind and if we open our mouth with the intention of talking openly about the Gospel Heavenly Father will provide a way. He will help us. 

1) think of all of the opportunities we have to talk to people we don't already know: bus, school, store, park, work, street, etc etc.

2) Be yourself and use Mormon words.

As you live the Gospel, talking in a way that you don't hide the Gospel, it will be apparent in the things you say... not boasting or talking about things you don't do, but just talk openly using Mormon words about the life you live. 

3) Open doors, don't force people through them.  As you talk openly using Mormon words, you open the door for someone who is interested to ask a question or figuratively walk through the door to a great discussion.  If  they don't go through the door, that's ok. You opened it, and maybe another time they will choose to go through the door.

4) Inspired invites.  As you truly love and listen to who you are talking to something in what they say can always be brought back to a truth of the Gospel of which you can invite them to have more of.  Most people care about their family, feeling happy, feeling peace, being ok temporally, etc etc. the gospel has answers to all questions because truth is truth and it works. 

I invite you each to look for 2 opportunities this week to talk to someone you don't know and try to find a way to use Mormon words in your conversation. Be kind. Be yourself, and you will be the means that someone feels more of God's love in their life. 

I love you all and I'm so grateful for your love and support.  I can't even believe that this is the last week of this transfer. It went by so fast. It has been amazing!!!!  Love you!!!

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

pics: my last time seeing sister Johnson before she goes home. boo hoo.

my mom sent me a conference care package. she seriously is THE CUTEST MOM EVER!

 

For Thee Do I Ever Plead

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from why-in-the-world-are-there-already-Thanksgiving-decorations-in-Walmart-don't-feel-good-about-it-Colorado! 

It just kills me because it reminds me how fast Thanksgiving is coming.  Bittersweet.

It was such an awesome week this week!!!  

We taught the Chinese exchange students on Friday. Brother Jardine from the ward came and they LOVED him! He was making jokes in mandarin and really helping them to understand what we had taught them about God and prayer. Sooooo cool.  There were a few new people there and one named Tim didn't even live at the house! He lives in Denver and had heard about the lessons and wanted to come.... WHAT???????????????? So amazing.  I feel so blessed.! There is a girl named Kay that I really love. She shared a testimony of God that was sooo beautiful. Man, I LOVE THIS!!!! 

We taught a new woman named Connie this week and she is soo prepared.  A few direct quotes from her are as follows: "Why do Mormons have such a bad rap? Don't you believe in Jesus too? I'm just seeking for truth.  I really want more light in my life right now, the world is weighing me down.  I love watching the Duggars on TV because they are moral and good people, it's refreshing. (lol)  I'm just really intrested in what you have to say! Oh, I already have a copy of the Book of Mormon!" etc etc... there obviously was dialouge in between those sentences, but you can catch the drift.  Amazing!  

I am soo happy.  Seriously this is soul burstin joy that simply comes from having the Lord play an active role in every day of my life.  Sharing the Gospel just brings so much happiness because we taste a portion of the joy that our Father feels when His children come closer to Him. He loves us soo much. His love is a real tangible thing that we can feel if we stop and look for it. 

My spiritual thought this week is on the importance of setting goals, and then prayerfully pleading with the Lord for help in accomplishing them.  Whether your goal is about missionary work, or increasing faith to live a certain commandment.  Talk with your Father about your goal... He often times has much input to give.  Then we resolve to do whatever we possibly can to accomplish the goal. Write down a few smaller steps you can take to accomplish the goal. Then we get some help from Heaven through PLEADING.  

What is the difference between praying and pleading?  I think the difference is how much desire and earnestness we show.  Where is the heart really at? In Enos 1:4 one could say that he plead with the Lord.  all day. and all night.  It says that his voice reaching high into the Heavens. God heard his prayer and answered.  (God hears and answers every prayer, but sometimes He just waits until He really feels the sincerity and real intent)  Even Jesus Christ pleads.  He pleads for us.  He earnestly, even desperately wants us to be able to be clean and live with our Father in Heaven again.  It is so humbling to know that the Lord pleads for me, and He pleads for you.  

I promise that if you will follow this pattern of prayerfully setting a righteous goal, and then pleading with the Lord for help in accomplishing it, that you will feel Heaven's help. You will be strengthened beyond your own means. You will see miracles. 

I love you so much.  I can't believe that it will be no time at all and I'll be back, crazy ol kinz.  I hope I'm different though, because I feel different.  I have been able to know the Lord because I've been working for Him, and I'm forever changed by that.  I pray for you, and sometimes I plead for you.  I love you all a lot.  

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

sorry no pics this week.... but hey, I'm getting my hair cut today! should I chop it off?? hmmm tempted.... stay tuned!  

THEN SINGS MY SOUL...

Hello Everyone!

Greetings from the-trees-are-beginning-to-change-color-and-I-couldn't-be-more-giddy-Colorado!

 

Man, this world is beautiful! 'nuff said.

 

I have had the most amazing week!!! I keep saying that, and I keep wondering how Heavenly Father can just keep making my mission better and better. He is so good.

 

We had an incredible miracle last week and so I'll share.  We were in a haze and we weren't quite sure of where we were needing to be because nothing was working out.  We plead with the Lord to help us and to know what we needed to do.  I thought of 2 potentials from the area book and sister Elwell thought of a members face. She was like.... that was crazy. We looked up all of their addresses and they were on the SAME STREET! ok ok let's go.  So we drive there and as we pulled up to the first house there was an Asian couple walking by. We got out and talked to them. They were soo nice, and actually are pastors for a non-denominational Christian church in Denver. But they were interested in what we do as missionaries and she said "are you missionaries of Jesus Christ?"... she was very right about that. She wanted us to come teach her and so we were on top of the moon happy!  We both felt like this could potentially turn in to the biggest miracle of our missions so far. Like in church history, Wilford Woodruff converted a pastor and THE WHOLE CONGREGATION WAS CONVERTED TOO! So, I have faith that the Lord could work an incredible miracle today too. 

 

Anyways, we go and teach Alice, she was AMAZING! She loved the visit and wants us to come multiple times in a week.  She also said that she has 11 Chinese foreign exchange students living with her and she wanted us to teach them all!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT???????   So... we did a few days later. They all came running down the stairs when we arrived and we sat around the table teaching them all. It was insane.  And wonderful. 

 

I don't know why Heavenly Father has blessed me so greatly on my mission but I just feel overwhelmingly grateful.  God is so good. Words can't even describe!!! Please pray for me and Sister Elwell to be able to accomplish what God needs us to accomplish!  I so need your prayers!  Thank you!!

 

I am so happy.  Seriously, my soul just feels on the verge of exploding sometimes.  It sounds crazy, but it is true. Anything we invest to serve the Lord will absolutely come back to us and fill our souls.  I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY! 

 

The best part about this, is that these blessings aren't just reserved for those of us with a name tag on.  Last night I went to a cottage meeting in the Bishop's home with 8 families that had taken "member finding lessons" from us missionaries where they learned how to find people to teach by just being a good friend and neighbor and how to talk to people about the gospel. Every single family had had a miracle experience and had felt their family grow stronger from engaging in this work.  Amazing. 

 

My invitation to all of you is to pray to see miracles in your life. In my letters in the following weeks, I'm going to share with you what we are sharing with the members here and inviting you to do the same things.  I know if you have a desire to share the gospel and if you try to do these things, you will see absolute miracles!  Stay tuned!!!

 

I love you all so much! I want you to feel this same joy that I feel. I pray for you!

 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie lou

 

pics: temple day happy day!

Light of the World

Hello everyone! 

Greetings from the-first-frost-and-bitter-cold-day-came-and-I-fear-that-it's-going-to-be-a-cold-winter-Colorado!  

It is my 16th month mission birthday! WHAAAAAT? yes.  So sad yet happy! 

What an amazing week it has been! Seriously!!!  This week a general authority came to tour our mission Elder Larry R. Lawrence of the Seventy.  I heard from him twice and it was incredible! His wife gave a 2 hour training on gathering Israel that was absolutely incredible!  She explained the Old Testament so simply and clearly and I see, now more than ever, that truth is eternal and that this work is so much bigger than me.  I'm a part of something that has been prophesied about forever!!!  So cool. When I have a spare few hours I'll fill you in on all the details. :) 

My spiritual thought today is on light.  In Alma 5:15 it asks the question "have you received His image in your countenance?"  Every time that our resurrected Lord has been described by prophets today a common word they use is describing His brightness and glory.  So to receive His image in our countenance we need to fill ourselves with light.  There is so much in the world today that is dark, and we need to avoid it like the plague, literally!  It is so easy to ask the question "Is this wrong?" when really the question we should ask is "Is this right?... Is this light and goodness I can add to my life?"... Maybe not a thought we have frequently as we go about the busyness of our lives, but that is the whole point of this life.  To do things that will make our light brighter, so when we stand before God we "shall see Him as He is, and we shall be like Him" (Moroni 7)  

How do we get more light?  Here is an acronym for you all: L.I.G.H.T.

L- love like Christ. Love everyone.

I-   invest time to study

G- go and do and keep the commandments. live it. 

H- hearken to the promptings of the Spirit

T- tell the Lord in prayer that you want more light, and He will give it to you.

I invite you all to do this. Sit down and think of what in your life brings you light, and what doesn't.  And then simply choose more light.  

I love the Savior.  I know that He really is the LIGHT and our perfect example and perfect Friend.  He will help us, He wants to help us.  

 I love you all! Please pray for me, I will pray for you!!!! 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

Pics:  I just wanted to show off my companion. She is sooo beautiful! 

Reap what we Sow ---

Hello Everyone!!!

Greetings from the-fall-weather-is-starting-to-set-in-and-I-hope-all-the-mosquitoes-die-quickly-Colorado!

Sister Elwell & I

What a week it has been here in Parker with Sis Elwell.  It is soo fun being with her.  She is so kind and is teaching me a lot!

It was a week of miracles. We contacted a TON of people that had been taught by missionaries in the past, and we are just trying to find those people who are ready for the Gospel.  It is hard work, but if we want to reap miracles, we have to sow hard work, diligence, faith, prayer, and patience.  I'm really grateful that I grew up on a farm and that my family always had a garden because there are so many amazing principles learned from that kind of work.

 First off: 1:  work work work even when you don't feel like it.

2: the small things you do today make a difference later (till, plant seeds, pull weeds, water, fertilize, keep deer away etc etc)

3: tomatoes don't grow overnight.... patience... we have to wait until they are ripe.

4:  in the end we don't have control of the weather or the quality of the seed, so we just do the best we can with what we've got.

These things apply in missionary work too. I have to remind myself that even though I have righteous desires to make a difference, I have to sow... and THEN reap.

My Spiritual thought today is on helping each other down the path.  Each and every one of us go through different trials and experiences. Those are the growing points in our lives, and they often are designed to give us an opportunity to rely on the Lord and come closer to Him.  Sometimes we may not fully understand why we had to go through a certain trial but in time all things make sense.  As Sister Elwell and I have been able to get to know each other better and talk to each other, we have realized that certain experiences we've had in our lives or in our missions have allowed us to help each other.  Truths that a companion taught me 2 transfers ago are just what my companion now needs to know... and she has been able to strengthen me because she has had similar questions that I face right now.... It's just amazing that God is sooo involved in our lives.  He places people in our path and just the right time so that we can grow and eventually be one step closer back to Him.  We never know when our experiences or testimony will change someone else's life, but the Holy Ghost knows.  He can prompt us to know what to share, or when to share, and who to share it with. 

My invitation to you all is to pray to be an answer to someone's prayer this week.  I promise if you pray daily for that, God will help you make a difference for someone else... In the process you will learn on a new level how much God cares for each of His children, including you.

I love you all so much and I can't believe how fast time is going.  I love my mission. I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY! I love trying to make my mission personal and to just serve the Lord with my WHOLE heart.  He is so good.

Love you!!!

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

pics:

been a while since I've sent a sunset...

Its. A. Small. World

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from there-are-absolutely-no-such-things-as-coincidences-Colorado!

I got transferred,,,, again!  That was such a quick 6 weeks, but it was so wonderful!  I'm now serving in Parker with SISTER ELWELL from BEAVER UTAH!!! I played soccer against her in high school (and i loved her then. she was the sweetest girl on that team) and I loved her at Utah State too... we had a lot of common friends up there and when she got her call to go to the mission I was going to I thought "no way! I'll have to be her companion!"  Sure enough.... here we are.  It is soo crazy. Heavenly Father is soo in charge of this work (Pres Mendenhall has NO idea that we knew each other before!) She is seriously one of the kindest people I've ever met in my life and I'm so excited to learn from her and just have a wonderful transfer together! Can't wait!!! 

I just have to say that I'm grateful for the way Heavenly Father teaches us through nature... bear with me, I'll sound like a hippie for a bit.  Always after a storm, even if it is brutal with gray skies that may seem like they will never be blue again, they are. And then comes a rainbow and a crispness in the air that is so refreshing to take a deep breath of.  Anyways, what I'm getting at is that a new day will always come. The storms always will end. It can always be better. 

Now I've not been depressed or anything like that, but last week was a tough week for sure.  (You all know that I'm an open book)  One of the hardest of my mission, BUT I'm so grateful for it.  I felt so much love from Heavenly Father and learned a little more about His plan for me, and I learned about His expectations.  I also learned about how crucial it is to have wonderful people in my life that give me so much love and support. Sister Johnson was there for me, and on other days I had to be there for her, but that's the beauty of friendship.  In many times of my life, I have been able to know that God loves me because I've had great friends who love me.... so grateful. 

I love the words of the hymn Come Come Ye Saints. 

Come, come ye saints

no toil nor labor fear. 

But with joy, wend your way

Though hard to you

this journey may appear 

Grace shall be as your day

Tis better far for us to strive

our useless cares from us to drive

Do this and joy, your hearts will swell

All is well. All is well. 

I interpret that as: 

Because of Jesus Christ, we really have no reason to fear. If we trust in Him, and do our best, He will always make us ok. Even if the journey seems hard, His grace and strength is there just like a new day, IT ALWAYS COMES.  I'm grateful that I have chances to "strive" and struggle and little and pray a little bit harder because Heavenly Father is just helping me to eliminate some of those "useless cares" .... just a little more fine tuning.  If we trust in Christ, no matter what surrounds us our hearts can swell with His love and joy and truly all is well in Zion.   I soooo know that is true, because I've witnessed it firsthand this week.  He is alive and well and still saving.  I love my Savior.  

I love all of you and hope that you have a wonderful week!  My invitation to you is to identify your favorite hymn.  Write down or type up (hmmm never thought about those phrases before,,,, weird) the lyrics to it and read it just as words, without thinking of the tune.  It's amazing - the doctrine in the green hymn book. 

I pray for you and miss you, but know that really, all is well in Zion.  I wouldn't mind getting another letter from you all hearing how you are doing and how you have seen your testimonies grow over the past year or so. I love hearing from you. (did that sound desperate? sorry.... haha) 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

 

pics:  

my fave family, the Distefanos.... both RMs. they taught me how I want my future family to be.... incredible. they just loooove the gospel and their little girls already are soo solid. amazing. 

spider. ok... i'm not afraid of spiders usually but this was the biggest spider I've ever seen with my own eyes.... in the window RIGHT NEXT TO MY BED... don't know how i feel about it.. yes I do.... NOT GOOD! 

What to do, when there is nothing to do?

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from everyone-and-their-dog-is-feeding-us-fresh-corn-on-the-cob-and-I-couldn't-be-happier-Colorado!

I love end of summer time!  BLT's, watermelon, corn on the cob, lemonade.... now I'm hungry. 

It's been an interesting week!   Sister Johnson has been to Nepal (and one day she will save that country) but she told me a phrase they say often. "ke garne" It means, "what to do?" In Nepal (it's a 3rd world country... where Mount Everest is if that helps with geography) their electricity will just randomly turn off for 8 hours. every day. So the people say "ke garne" and do the best with what they have.  Sometimes in missionary life.. or all the time... things fall apart. Everything that happens here is a product of someone else's agency.  Sometimes they ALL use their agency in ways I wish they wouldn't at the SAME TIME!.  So things seemingly have fallen apart here.... BUT I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for us and now we just have more time to find the elect, and to build trust with the members here. Ke Garne!  

We did have 2 amazing miracles. Benita. She soaked everything right up and is excited for a church to take her family to! Our recent convert Frances came to the lesson, and was THE MOST incredible missionary ever. So fun!  

Dayna. She had been taught in the past, but things had gotten a little hectic and so the missionaries stopped going.  We did some service for her and then she wanted us to come back to talk, not to do service. Great!  We talked with her and asked about her core beliefs and what she wants from our visits and the Spirit was soo strong. Everything that she had come to know as truth as she has studied allllll sorts of religions, lined up exactly with what we believe.  I do love that about being here and meeting so many people of different faiths, because God has truth everywhere. He just has all of the truth nice and summed up here in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  But she was so grateful to know that she could explore and study and ask God for what was true. We don't cram any truth down people's throats, but we teach and share what we know is true and then invite THEM to ask God, who will never lead them astray. It's beautiful. I love being a missionary!  

I know that God is our Loving Heavenly Father.  He loves us and has a plan for each and every one of us.  I know that Jesus Christ is the Savior and that because of Him, even when we don't understand perfectly, we can know with surety that everything will be ok.  Tomorrow can always be better. I know that the Gospel is complete and true and it contains answers to every question. I know that this church is living. It is led by the living Christ through a living prophet.  So amazing. I know that everything happens for a reason, and that we are placed in people's paths (or people in our paths) for a reason to help us learn and grow.  

I love you all and am grateful for you.  I miss you and hope that you are well! I know life is busy but I hope you are taking the time to live.  

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

pics:

temple trip! sis Johnson and I 

Sister Roquemore (who i live with... I LOVE HER!) she is a speeeeeeeeedster. notice the speed she is going on the dash. I didn't think that it was possible for people of her age to move that fast. 

That Bites --

Hello Everyone! 

Greetings from I'm-seriously-developing-West-Nile-phobia-Colorado!  I kid you not when I tell you that I currently have 27 MOSQUITO BITES!!!!!!! Sister Johnson has 4.  My life is a fairy tale.  I've also discovered on my mission that I'm allergic to mosquitoes.... this too shall pass.  I guess it's a way for me to keep working on self control....??  Heavenly Father definitely has a sense of humor.

What a week. I realized that if I'm not learning I might as well be dead.  This week was a bit of a tough one, but I feel like I'm growing the most.  Things that I'm currently learning: I'm not in control. People have agency... duh. Breathe when it's ok to breathe. Be grateful. Being perfect does not mean never making a mistake. Big miracles come from small promptings. Just to name a few.... 

We were teaching a less active sister in the ward, Glenda... (who I just ADORE!) and Sis J felt prompted to ask her who she knew that we could teach. (She had already asked Glenda many times before) Glenda told us about her neighbor.  We were headed to the car and I felt we should contact them right then and so we headed over. The daughter pulled up EXACTLY as we walking to the door. We talked to her... less than interested. But across the street were 2 men working on an old van. I was totally expecting them to tell me to get lost... (my b.)  We had a GREAT conversation with them and one's wife came out mid convo. I explained about the Book of Mormon to Chad and Alisha perked up and asked if she could possibly have one too.... oh I guess so.... WHAT! It was so exciting! We are going back to teach them on Tuesday!!!!  I learned that as Sis J and I both are seeking the Spirit and we follow it and trust each other for promptings we individually receive, great things happen!!!! I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY!!! 

As I've been getting to know more members here, I've found 2 people who know and love good ol Holden, Utah.... It's such a small world. Sorry... random thought. 

My spiritual thought today is on the importance of prayerfully setting goals. If we don't know where we are headed, how can we get there???  This week I've had the chance to take some time to ponder and set some goals for my future life.  As I've done this, I've been filled with God's love, hope, and faith. I know that He has great things in store for me. I know that He has many things He wants me to accomplish.  I know that as I have a clear direction of where I'm headed and who I want to BE in a year's time, or 5 year's time, or a Lifetime with His Grace I can become that. I know that as we do our very best, and rely on the Lord we give Him opportunities to work miracles in our lives.  It all starts with faith, and trusting Him....

I invite you all to prayerfully set goals for where you want to be spiritually in a year. What do you want your relationship with God to be like?  What do you want to learn about in studying the scriptures? What will your faith be unshaken in? 

 I LOVE THE GOSPEL! I love the chance we have to learn and grow and become more like Christ.  I'm so happy, even during days that are hard and sad. Because of Him.  

I love you all and I miss you so much.... In the beginning of my mission, I asked Sister Burnett when I would stop missing my family. She had been out for 5 months and she told me... Never. That's part of the reason why we leave our families, to realize how precious they are to us.  I pray for you and love you so much!!! 

Onward Christian Soldiers!

From me to you, Sister Kinzie Lou

 pics:

downtown Brighton last p day. do i look angry? it's because I am... haha... EVERYTHING WAS CLOSED ON MONDAY! all 5 stores. WHHHYYYYYYY? HAHHA... 

Sis Grenfell and I at zone conference.... i love her. I've been so blessed with mi compeneras!